Foolscap Tomes

An ad for this site popped up for me today on Facebook:

http://braithwaitewallets.com/wallets/9-orpheus

Aside from the disturbing accuracy with which Facebook now places ads in front of me (guitar player, IT income, appreciation for crafts/functional art), the true genius of the site lies in the narratives surrounding each wallet, the spirit of which I paraphrase here:

As Xavier, known to his more intimate associations as ‘Jay,’ read the subtly placed advertisement, he asked himself why he had never recognised the wallet as the natural extension of his persona that it . . . Must . . . BE! Perhaps this was a portion of his gentlemanly education that his Grandfather’s manservant, Gerard, had carelessly overlooked, or, more likely, it was a nugget of gold that Xavier had overlooked when rejecting the rest of the Aristocratic dross forced upon him by his imperious progenitors.

But then, why couldn’t he have the best of both worlds: artistic refinement with a common touch? Xavier reached for his now patently inferior wallet, with not a little disgust, to retrieve his credit card and place the order that would validate his standing amongst his peers while showing his ancestors the mettle of which he was made. . . .

The sad thing is that it is a very pretty wallet and if I could get past paying $107 plus tax and shipping for less than a square foot of leather that will spend most of its functional life pressed snugly against my sweaty left ass-cheek, I’d likely buy it in a heartbeat.

A few months ago my friend Bernie told me about his experiences shaving with old style safety razors. At the time it sounded like more trouble than it was worth and the community of weirdly fanatical DE (double edge razor) shavers seemed a bit like the Robert Bly/Iron John folks to me. However, I then got to thinking about the amount of plastic, metal, and money I throw out every week with my disposable cartridges. Then, Bernie posted a picture of his new Merkur Open Comb razor and I decided to look into it a bit. I discovered that I can use all steel blades with a steel disposal safe (about $0.99 to hold many blades) and recycle the whole thing. Being a beginner, I ordered the Merkur 34C recommended on many online sites:

Essentially, it is three pieces of steel (four if you count the blade): a guard, a handle, and an adjustment nut at the base of the handle:

Simple, clean, and sustainable. The only things more sustainable are a straight razor, for which I am just not manly/dedicated enough right now, or a full beard, which I only grow seasonally (and skipped this year entirely).

My kit arrived while I was out of town, so I only just got to try the razor for the first time today. It was probably the best shave I’ve ever had (which, as those of you who are aware of my hairiness know, can be an issue). I’m still getting the hang of working around the nose and chin, but I didn’t come out of it with any more nicks than I do from cartridge razors. Plus, I think this is the first time I’ve had a truly clean shave since I was 17. Shaving does require a bit more care and effort, but a week of practice will solve that. I also think I might prefer a razor with a longer handle in the future (for $30 I’m not that concerned with buying another down the road and passing this one along).

Anyway, this shave was so good I am actually beginning to understand the weird culture of DE shaving and the need to share strange personal grooming experiences online (hence this post). I don’t think I’ll be going in for the fancy boar bristle brushes, and the reasonably green shaving cream I keep confusing with the toothpaste of the same brand still works just fine (yes, Scott, I know you hate it), but I really love my new razor.

I was just listening to Worldview, an NPR world news “magazine” produced by Chicago Public Radio. One of today’s articles was titled The Economics of Sex Slavery and was an interview with Siddharth Kara, a former investment banker who turned his business and financial expertise to researching the economics of the global sexual slavery industry. His goal was to define the extent of the industry through economic analysis and then to investigate methods of ending sexual slavery, again through economic means, as it is currently viewed as a vastly profitable and relatively low-risk criminal industry. He has now published a book titled Sex Trafficking: Inside the World of Modern Slavery.

The article was quite interesting, if somewhat sickening as it covered issues from children being sold into slavery by their families to Bosnian women and children being rounded up for sale by Serbian soldiers following the slaughter of the men of the villages. One statistic the author mentioned was that, by his conservative estimate, between 9%-12% of men worldwide will, knowingly or otherwise, use the services of a sex slave at some point in their lifetimes. He also had an anecdote of a woman in Amsterdam who was turned over to her enslavers by the police after she had sought shelter at the police station. Part of the point of this was that prostitution in Amsterdam is legal and commonly perceived by tourists as being safe and “guilt free” [read: stick with the gourmet weed].

Anyway, this shouldn’t be a shock to most of you, but give it a listen.

The president of my school forwarded this N.Y. Times article to the campus: Informal Style of Electronic Messages Is Showing Up in Schoolwork, Study Finds

I don’t know much about the National Writing Project, but it is worrisome to me that the head of the organization cannot explain the function of capitalization and periods. TheFreeDictionary’s definition of “sentence” is, “a grammatical unit that is syntactically independent and has a subject that is expressed or, as in imperative sentences, understood and a predicate that contains at least one finite verb.” In other words, a sentence is a single, coherent statement that includes a subject, object, and action or description. Sentences are basic logical elements. The capital letter at the start of a sentence marks the initiation of the statement and the period denotes its closing. Without these (and other) grammatical elements, the articulation thought becomes ill-defined.

Grammar is our first exposure to symbolic logic and is the cognitive foundation upon which causality and critical thinking are built. Without these tools history can seem nothing but a random string of events, algebra and the physical sciences are completely unobtainable, and the individual’s participation in democratic government is reduced to his or her voting candidates “on or off the island.” Further, computers and other technological tools become magical devices or even minor deities whose behaviors seem capricious–ultimately unknowable and unchangeable other than by following arcane rituals or consulting a shaman or priest. Economic principles such as compounding interest (in regard to both personal debt and long-term savings) become meaningless and are ignored for instant gratification. Concepts such as predestination, manifest destiny, “droite du seigneure” and Lamarckian genetics all become plausible again.

In short, and imnsho, a culture that discards the early teaching of grammar, or abandons it all together, is a good basis for a dystopian science fiction story. Of course, it could also be a possible explanation of Rome after Marcus Aurelius. Did Commodus institute an equivalent to “No Child Left Behind?” ;^)